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Trust everyone. Welcome to Night Vale.
— Cecil



"Valentine" is the 17th episode of Welcome to Night Vale. It was released on February 15, 2013.

Synopsis[]

Emergency crews are on hand to help clean up the aftermath of the worst Valentine's Days in recent memories. Plus, important schedule changes at the Night Vale Airport, the City Council votes to choose an official town language, and updates on the Post Office.

Plot Developments[]

Recurring Segments[]

Corrections[]

And now for corrections. We offer the following corrections to previous reports broadcast on Night Vale Community Radio:

1. Blue, not green.

2. A low whirring sound was heard only by those to the West of it.

3. The witness’s name was Henry Greggson, and not, as we reported, Crystal Souleater.

4. We were feeling, at best, fine, and not, as we stated on the record, “pretty good thanks”.

5. No! No! Do not do what we advised! We were so terribly, terribly wrong. If you have done it already…well, our heart goes out to those who miss you. Please forgive us. Please forgive us.

This has been corrections.

Community Health Tips[]

Hey! Here's a health tip from the Greater Night Vale Medical Community. It's possible you won't be able to kill it. If it manages to burrow under your skin, stop fighting because it has already become part of you. Welcome your new body-mate. Listen to what it has to say, and see where the new symbiotic lifestyle takes you!

Traffic[]

And now traffic. A representative from the Sheriff’s Secret Police, waving vaguely at a map in our studio, said that there are street closures, quote, “all over” “Just all over the general area,” the representative said, tapping the edge of the map with two knuckles, “a bunch of them in different places.” We asked if he could be more specific and he nodded, but did not say anything more. We tried naming a number of streets, to see if any of them were included on the list of closures, but the representative only replied with a “oh yeah, I mean, probably” and an ambiguous head waggle to each one.  He added that anyone caught on a closed road would be dealt with in the usual manner, and then he winked and gave me a thumbs up. It is possible he was merely a vagrant who wandered into the studio. We didn’t bother to check his credentials. Just to be safe, though, look out for road closures all over in the general area, listeners. They’re in a bunch of different places, probably. This has been traffic.

Proverb

Werner Herzog is the most interesting person.
— Proverb


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